Clear Horizons

My MO HealthNet (Medicaid) was threatened and due to my mental health I was seriously worried and depressed. I met with one of the state office assistants, who was very nice and made some copies of documents, I provided. She gave me further advice on what I should do. The answer wasn’t complete but appeared positive. It rained prior to the meeting, and afterwards the sky was clear. Walking outside, I could only pray “Thank You”.

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#pray #prayer, #thanks #thankyou #insurance #healthinsurance #Medicaid, #clearskies #positivefeelings #mentalhealth #depression #worried

Ashamed to ask for help

Essentially I believe that a few possibilities could have caused disrealization based anxiety attacks at an early age. In short, I was ashamed of myself. As my mental health worsened, I remained silent and never sought out help. My ex-wife listened to my concerns and lovingly helped me. When on the verge of suicide during our divorce in 2007 when I was 41 years old, I finally voluntarily sought out professional help. Along with alcoholism and depression, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, Complex Partial Seizures (epilepsy), Sleep Apnea, and Borderline Personality Disorder. Today, I work at a grocery store, and may have to fight for some state benefits that I currently receive. If necessary, I’ll seek help from anywhere imaginable since I am not ashamed of who I am today. Currently I only pray that my heart is at peace when God’s will is done.

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#shame #ashamed #silence #help #professional #suicide #depression #pray #peace #professionalhelp #anxiety #anxietyattacks #complexpartialseizires #seizures #epilepsy #divorce #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #alchohalic #alcoholism

The Horror of Yourself

I was at work one day, and a young woman reacted in a way that raised many eyebrows. I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and she had a can good left in her shopping cart. My coworker went to hand it to me so I could ring it up. She said she wasn’t stealing anything and that she doesn’t steal anything. She added that she didn’t want it and in fact that she didn’t want anything she selected. She immediately left the store. Her cart was full of items, and people leave things in their carts quite often. No one accused her of any theft. My coworker was dumbfounded. Unfortunately, I had a pretty good idea of what her problem probably was, as I have reacted in similar bizarre fashions over little to no infractions. With her, I’m guessing, however with myself, I forgot to take my mental health medications. Seeing her, drilled into my brain the importance of following my doctors’ instructions.

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#mentalillness #mentalhealth #overreaction #mental #health #illness #medications #medication #doctor #doctors #instructions #physicians #physician #grocerystore #cashier #response #accusation #theft #stealing #buying #shopping #shoplifting

If people, groups, religions, nations just respected others, peace would rule.

If people, groups, religions, nations just respected others, peace would rule.

Dieckieiman marshmallow Easter eggs are in German because my niece who lives there brought a cartoon over for Easter. The origin of peace would be respect for all.

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#peace, #respect, #people #others, #groups #religions #nations #Easter #Eastereggs #marshmallow #chocolate #marshmallowchocolateeggs#Dieckieiman #German #U.S.

Smiling Can Bring Happiness

Just a completely silly post based on a premise I’ve always held and recently learned was quite true on the internet. Ya know, anything ya find on the intranets has gots to be true. Anywho, laughter is the best medicine kinda thing, because (for me) it gets me out of a depressed, anxious whirlwind “braino~tornado” that spirals between my ears.

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#joke #laughterisbestmedicine #laugh #laughter #funny #smile #cheapestmedicine #burrito #beans #NBA #depression #anxiety #brain #worry #braino #tornado #brainotornado #silly #

Making Yourself Feel Better

With myself helping others leads to a sense of inner peace and happiness. While being a jerk and acting out in an angry manner always leads to anxieties coupled with depression.

On my break today, a woman who had an amputated leg was needing help getting to her ride. Without thought I automatically went to her. She was an acquaintance of mine, not a stranger, but this was my break. Regardless of the degree of my heroism, I could see she was appreciative, which made me feel amicable.

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#supportive #helping #helpingothers #self-esteem #innerpeace #peace #peaceful #peaceofmind #rude #anger #anxiety #anxieties #depression

Small Acts of Love Can Lead to Inner Peace

The store I work at has stickers for children as Mom is checking out. I always love it when kids play with these goofy stickers, giggling while slapping them on themselves. My self esteem is increased producing a sense of inner peace due seeing their joy, while all I did was hand Mom the sticker.

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#love #actsoflove #joy #grocerystore #sticker #children #stickers #innerpeace #peace #smallactsoflove #kids

Bright Sunshine v. Darkness

I struggle with depression and anxiety, which has lead me to do things I’ve regretted. Oddly enough, I have supportive friends & family members who would at least listen to my fears & concerns, much like shining “suns”. Why don’t I tell them of the whirlwinds in my mind? My only response is that I’m too prideful to admit that I need help.

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#sun #sunshine #bright #brightness #brightsunshine, #darkness #depression #depressed #anxiety #worries #worried #concerns #concerned #fear #fears #support #family #familymembers #friends #listen #pride #pridefulness #help #needhelp, #regret #regretted

Any Time is the Right Time to Pray

Any time is the right time to pray. I was in Walmart’s parking lot when I realized I had lost my cell phone. I was waiting 15 to 20 minutes for my Dad & prayed. I couldn’t afford a new one & I don’t have any insurance. By the time he arrived, my heart was at peace. Whatever the outcome, I knew I would survive. When we got to our previous stop, I asked at the service counter if a phone had been turned into the lost & found. In 30 seconds, I called out, “Thank you God!”
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#pray #prayers #willofGod #God #thankyou #thankful #gratitude #grateful #grocery_store #Walmart #timing #innerpeace #thanksgiving